To help you learn what your parenting style is, use the short survey below. To select your answers, simply write down on a piece of paper the number in front of each statement you believe is like you.
There are 3 parenting styles: soft, harsh, and balanced. On the survey, the first five statements focused on the soft side, so if you selected mostly those statements your style is probably soft. The last five statements focused on the harsh side, and if you selected mostly those statements your style is probably harsh. If you selected none or almost none of the statements in the survey, you probably have a style that is more balanced. Bravo!
The soft style is characterized by a tendency to be weak on establishing and enforcing rules and limits for children. The soft style parent often allows children to have their own way, even when it is in their best interest not to. This style causes children to feel insecure because it does not meet their basic psychological need for limits. In a permissive home environment children feel disconnected from their parents and do not develop a sense of cooperation. Consequently, these children grow up to be at high risk for problematic and self-
The harsh style of parenting is characterized by the parent’s need to have absolute control over everything his children do, as well as issuing harsh consequences and having little tolerance for his children to express opinions or ask questions. Children who are brought up under the harsh style of an authoritarian parent are well behaved, but out of fear. The ridged harshness of the parent is discouraging and as they grow older these children develop strong resentments toward their parents. In rebellion they reject their parents’ rules and values.
The balanced style of parenting is firm but gentle, sets limits but believes in giving explanations and views discipline as a means of teaching children how to develop into self-